VACATION! VACATION! VACATION! PART 2

This was the motel where we stopped the first night. Nice place and highly recommended by us! Inexpensive, too!

Menudo! Menudo! Menudo! I hadn't had a batch of menudo in a long time so this was the chance! They have the best menudo! Folks come from all around to suck that stuff up! It's in Corning, CA for all you menudo fans. Tell'em "Menudo Ran" sent  you!

 Autumn is just sooooo pretty!

"Black Butte" at Shasta, CA.

On the road again! We'll be in Longview, WA by early evening.

In the previous update, it was obvious that the old folks from Rancho Relaxo were tired when they got home. However, they were quite exhausted when they departed. That meant that the original plan to drive to Redding, CA (387 mi.) on the first day just wasn’t feasible.

Redding has been my personal traditional northbound stopping point for a number of reasons. Not the least of those is the fact that you can find a place to stay without much effort at all. I have forsaken the God-forsaken Motel 6’s having learned long ago that there are much better deals for the same or less money (good deals are our friends). Sure; I’ll still unpack at one if they are the only motel available within a reasonable distance. But, they are pretty much at the bottom of my list.

Another reason is that Redding is a fair distance to travel in one day (almost 400 miles…and I'm giving thanks that I am not in a “prairie schooner” making ten miles per day on average). It’s a good first step toward making it to our first stop in Longview, Washington by late in the afternoon or early evening the next day (a total of about 830 miles or so or 15-16 hours depending). Starting at Willows makes for a long ten hour drive (not pushing) for the second day. But, we started fresh and full.

Another is not so much applicable these days as say 25 years ago when I traveled between CA and WA a couple of times per year; there are more good places in Redding to feed the crew.

Moving along with the moving along: the tired trippers tried to hang tough but ended up calling it a day in Willows, CA. I’ve actually spent the night there at least once that I recall. That was back before I became adverse to the idea of staying in a "Motel 6" whose only perk or plus was a hot cup of coffee in the morning after spending a night in a cramped room (even their “two queens” rooms are claustrophobic). 

Willows is a surprisingly nice place to stop. Our choice for the night was a generic “wake up and smell the curry” motel (amazingly cheap because we are too) that was a pleasure to stay in. Clean….large room….restaurant around the corner or up the pike a short way (more about that in a moment)…excellent, friendly, positive, helpful staff….not much to complain about at all.

The next morning, knowing that we had to put some kilometers behind us, we got a fairly early start. A quick pass at the continental breakfast and we’re BOI (back on the Interstate).

It was a beautiful CAVU day! In fact, the weather was incredibly accommodating the entire trip (both ways!). This trip was one of only two that I can remember in 25 years where it didn’t rain either most or part of the way coming and going. Not that I don’t like rain. Au contraire; I love the rain and don’t mind driving in it (what? You didn’t already know that the Ol’ Rancher is a dyed-in-the-wool goofball?).

As we boogied up the pike on our next leg (can you really boogie in an SUV? You can but it does lack a certain panache), I had not at all forgotten about the “Petro” truck stop in Corning a mere 30 minutes north of Willows. That is where they parked an “Iron Skillet” buffet which just happens to be my favorite in the chain (although the one in Amarillo, TX runs a close second. It’s right across from the airport, too)! It was amazing that I had completely worn out my continental breakfast by the time we made it to Corning!

All seriousness aside, the main reason and target of my hunger was that they have the absolute best menudo I’ve ever eaten! I tell them that every time I go in there and they just smile and say “Thank you!”. They also say that people come from all over to get their menudo! I shouldn’t wonder.

So, after adding a few…well…OK...a lot…of other items to my tray, it is easy to say that I had a “real” breakfast that morning. Menudo is our friend. After all, there is a reason that so many Mexicans eat it. Sure, it takes a bit of getting used to (not so much the taste but the texture) but it’s worth it. I've even had the "white menudo" down in Baja (somewhere south of Ensenada, as I recall). It isn't bad at all but I prefer the red stuff. 

After all the menudo, tacos, burritos, chili verde, chiIi Colorado, chile rellenos, carne asada, carne de res, carnitas, chili con carne, and chicharones I’ve eaten (think “tons”), it’s easy to think that I’m at least a pseudo-Mexican by now (sure glad that doesn’t require a DNA test).

It was a good thing that we were driving an SUV because I’m not sure that a Nissan Altima (our first option for a rental car) would have hauled us out of the parking lot. Boy….were we stuffed!

The next leg of the trip was the most scenic. Crossing the Siskyou Mountains is always interesting but it’s even more so in the fall when the leaves are all expressing their demise in the most glorious and splendorous way.

Most of the rest of the trip to Longview, WA was uneventful. We hadn’t had too many assaults on our lives and had no car problems. And, the terrain hadn’t changed much. I had travelled that route many times so not much was new and exciting.

The big black SUV finally rolled into Longview right on time and with a couple of tired and hungry travelers on board. It was about 8PM and the beds at the “Econolodge” were beckoning us like Sirens to unlashed sailers.

We’ve found “Econolodge” to be a pretty good deal overall. They have really reasonable rates (I think the most we paid was 67 dollars) and have a hot breakfast in most places. Their rooms are as large as any we’ve stayed at and the service at this particular place was super. In fact, the only motel at all that had a larger room was the "Seaside Inn" on Beech Street in Morro Bay (and I think the "Harbor House" on Main St. may have had a similar sized room). Later, at an “Econolodge” in Chehalis, WA, we were even more pleased (more later on that).

Plan A was to call son, Michael, and have him and his new wife, Mary, come over from Rainier, OR (about 15 minutes or so). However, given the status of our aged airframes and bent landing gear, we opted for Plan B which was to call and advise them “Let’s do this tomorrow morning”. That was fine with them. So, we unloaded the barge and berthed for the night.

There you have it. Part 2 of the Rancho Relaxo Report. Stay tuned; we’ve a ways to go.

VACATION! VACATION! VACATION! PART 1

 This is the Mitsubishi Outlander we rented for three weeks. I have yet to drive a more comfortable, easy handling, smooth breaking, quite and comfortable riding, straight tracking, car in my entire life. My Cadillac didn't ride as nicely as this black beauty. Talk about quiet! Not once, not twice, but three times I got out of the car and Connie asked me if I was going to turn it off! Unreal! Want one!

To the right is just one of the many ultra-gorgeous shots of the area around Mt. Vernon, WA. I went "click happy" with my camera the entire trip!

 

This shot is from Ranier, OR just across the river from Longview, WA. It's a tribute to dear friend and sister, Fern Hill whose husband is now convinced that she is related to or knows just about everyone on the entire west coast.

This is the "Corningware" store in Burlington, WA near where Connie's son, Tracey, and his family live (Bow). We try to at least stop at the big outlet malls when we know there's a "Corningware" store there. There aren't many so we don't go that often. 

Unfortunately, we saw a lot of burned countryside. This is on I-5 north of Redding where they had the big fires last year. When we got near Paradise, as you can suspect, it was pretty  ugly. 

Anyone who has traveled north in California immediately recognizes this big pile of rocks. It's Mount Shasta. I must say that this is the first time I've seen it without its snow coat on, though. This is not the first time we've stopped at this "Pilot Travel Center" for a break.

Well….we did it! We managed to wend and eat our way through four states. It was burgers, buffets, and beyond! I’m not sure that’s a truly great accomplishment for the books but it surely was a tasty one! The best news is that we are now home safe and sound (if not a bit overweight and a lot worn out) and really really (times ten-to-the-6th power) happy to be back at the ranch. We were most thankful that we made the trip without incident and with minimal teeth, hair, and money loss.

  

It’s not that we’re cheap; we are frugal but we don’t toss money into the wind just to see which way it’s blowing. For instance, we took advantage of a super deal at the “Corning Store” in Burlington, WA. They were closing out some of their 60 year commemorative products and they just happened to be the design that Connie the Canner has been collecting for many moons! She didn’t have some of the pieces so, to help complete the collection, we loaded up! That was a cool 75% savings! We only spent a tad over 100 dollars so….do that math on that! Closeouts are our friends!

  

Actually making it home alive was probably the greatest of accomplishments. It’s not that there weren’t hoards of other drivers who were insistent upon trying to kill us. Not so. There was no lack of those who had not given the least thought of arriving at their destination either alive or in one peace. They all thought less of us. However, we managed to out-maneuver them and avoid having our bodies reduced to just enough matter to fill a good-sized dust pan.

  

The greatest peeve was the “bumper sticker”. Y’all know that driver well, I’m sure. It doesn’t matter at what velocity you are traveling; he’ll stay within a few feet of your bumper. You can’t even see his headlights in your rear view mirror. If you speed up to 20 mph over the speed limit, he’s on your tail within a car length. If you out accelerate him, he’ll catch up. If you slow to the speed limit, he’s still there and at any point in between. Rather than take a chance on having any of them end up as a hood ornament (by way of the rear seat), I just pulled over and the let the crazies go on by. It was my day off and it wasn’t a good day to die. The way I see it, vacationing isn’t supposed to resemble an on-going near-death experience. 

  

Since there was still so much work left undone before leaving, we decided that, upon our return, we would “hit the deck a’runnin’”. Right.  Let me tell you right now......that did not happen. The old folks were so beat after the trip that we hit the deck a’crawlin’. Man! We entered the house and were both looking for the dump truck that had just ran over us! UGH! It may take a while for us to recover so the urgency to tear into things at the ranch has greatly waned. We’ll do our runnin’ and tearin' later (about the year 2020 should work just fine).

  

Getting a move on: after the yard sale, there was little time to do anything but tidy up and finish the planning of our escape. The “tailings” of the sale had to be re-boxed and organized with some of it being returned to the hangar for storage. We made a deal with another friend who wanted to purchase our leftovers. Boy! Did that ever help us out! But, even that simple plan was delayed for a few days for logistic reasons on his part. That left us scrambling to compensate for the delay and doing so with an expedited manner (note: tired old folks don’t scramble very well).

Eventually the gentleman came and retrieved the goodies. With that steel I-Beam off our shoulders, we were able to shift up one gear. You may want to note that such up-shifting involves an even greater expenditure of physical and psychological resources. Ol’ Ran and Connie the Canner needed both like the Luftwaffe needed gasoline in April of ‘45. So, next time, we will try to remain in the more comfortable lower gears. “Next time” meaning that it’s contingent upon convincing ourselves to engage in "TWO" (traveling while old) again. 

  

Nevertheless, progress was being made and, somehow, we were able to be on time to get the rental car in Visalia on Saturday morning. That jaunt enabled us to also procure a nice lunch at “Home Town Buffet”. Progress is our friend.

  

We weren’t bird nerds any longer so that eased the overall matter somewhat. Instead of having friend, neighbor, and fellow bird brain, Gary Oscena, chicken sit for us (he did offer. We have great neighbors in Springville!), we gave long-time friend, and neighbor, Leeann Chapman, our last clutch of cluckers. The three and a half hens (one is a bantum) and one bantum rooster will be happy in their new home.

  

Leann had been pondering getting some birds so we helped to jump-start the matter. With the help of one of our cages, and some chicken scratch, she’ll have some fresh eggs on hand in no time.

  

Oh, yes: the cage. Well, it seems that “someone” (aka Ol’ Ran, Bro. Doo Dah, Rancho Ran, or what all) wasn’t paying attention during the transporting of the cage to Leeann’s place (only about 6 miles down the lane (aka “Highway 190”).  It was a short haul and we wouldn’t be traveling all that fast. Besides, the fairly heavy cage was mostly wire with a small enclosed part at one end. Not much there to present resistance to the wind and incur “slipstreaming”, eh? If you think that, you haven’t been reading the blog updates for very long. Things at Rancho Relaxo aren’t that easy.

  

Sooooooo…..the head Ranch Dufus-In-Charge-of-Screwups, wanting to expedite the matter (because every muscle in his body but the ones which controlled the wiggling of his ears was screaming) failed to take three minutes to secure the cage after loading it into Wooly Pulley. Hey…..Wooly Pully has 4’ high stake sides and the cage only stuck up about two feet above them. No chance of a problem here. Besides, it was getting dark and we needed to get move on. Suuuuure.

  

As luck would have it (definition of bad luck: the result of being too stupid or lazy to take a few minutes to avoid catastrophe by implementing long-established protocols and procedures that are there to keep you from extreme consequences), we got about a half-mile from home and my fantasy ended abruptly. The cage quickly exited the trailer and engaged in high-velocity uncontrolled flight into the terrain…the really hard, unforgiving, unyielding terrain (think: cumulo-asphalt). Got any ideas what happened after that? Uh-huh. Splinterville.

 Prior to getting out of the van, my lightning-fast mind first advised that, “Oh, that was brilliant, Ran. Whatcha got for an encore?”. Then it portended, “This isn’t going to be pretty”. And….it wasn’t.

   

My really neat cage was no longer neat at all. It was disassembled in chunks that were scattered across the highway (a highway with real cars on it that love to track down and disassemble people). Thankfully, traffic was light so no cars were trying to throw themselves over my cage and…..me.  In a few minutes, the observable pieces (we found a major piece later) were placed in the trailer for the quick haul home. Way to go, Ran.

  

Back at the ranch, the Ol’ Rancher, now rather worn out and trying to construct a plan of attack that neither his body nor his soul were willing to engage in, simply unloaded the parts and pieces and took a shower; it would have to wait until mañana. Despite the respite, my body parts were too tired to do the high-five.

Other aspects of the trip were addressed for the remainder of the evening so, the dynamic-less duo didn’t get a lot of rest. The next day would be a doozy too. I couldn't wait.

   

There you have it: part one of the amazing (that we survived) adventures of the Rancho Yo-Yo Twins (we’re always forgetting stuff and having to return to the ranch to get it). Stay tuned for the next update which will be coming up soon (if the Ol’ Rancher can stay awake at the keyboard). It will be…..interesting.