Abbie after learning that Her Naughtiness wasn't
going to be invited to the BBQ feast. Her countenance changed and she regained
her ebullient demeanor after we fed her some cooked fat and trimmings from the
mouth-watering, delicious, well-charred-but-not-overcooked New York Strip steak
(y’all hungry yet?).
Just eat it (thank you, Michael Jackson)!This was our first time to knock over a
"P. F. Chang's" and we did enjoy it especially since it was with the
family. The food was good and the service was excellent. We had the pad Thai
noodles, broccoli beef, shrimp friend rice, and the chicken lettuce wrap
(apparently a national favorite!). These were all ordered and then we served up
family style. I texted Jeff and Sandra Minnick in Abilene to advise where we
were. Sandra emphasized the lettuce wrap and Trixie was already on it! Couldn't
miss!
This is one of our new additions to the work force around here. Connie the Canner got it for me for "Father's Day". It's a 14 gallon "Shop Vac" SVX2. We're talkin' about a 6.5 hp motor and a 170 cfm airflow that can pull a newly born elephant away from its momma! Yessiree, folks.....this baby really sucks!
We've got grapes! Here are a couple of bunches of grapes from the vines along the front yard. It's kinda nice when the birds or thieves don't get them first, eh?
It’s September! Doesn’t that just put a dent in your
Datsun?! That’s 75% of the year gone and only 140% more things to get done
before the next year gets here! *SIGH*.
Rancho Report: Well, progress is being made here at
the ranch as we orbit around the G2 main sequence star we call the “Sun” (but
only after huntin’ me up a good cup of coffee, that is).
The grandkiddies from Harbor City/Torrence came up
for a visit. We met them in Bakersfield at P. F. Chang’s. Lots to talk about
here so let’s start with lunch!
P. F. Chang’s is a high end Chinese Restaurant and
it’s the first time Connie and I have been there (and we're the last to know
that it existed). I get the picture that they have been around awhile so it’s
old news to everyone else.
The decor is grand and they even sport a 20 high
statue of a horse out front. You can’t miss the place. The service was grand
and the food was quite good. It was a real treat, to be sure.
After lunch, we drove about a mile to a neighborhood
park so the kids could romp a bit and the adults could get some overdue jawing
done. The temperature was in the mid ‘90’s but, with the shaded tables, it was
quite bearable.
After lots of snacks, pictures, and hugs all around,
we all had to depart. They had to get back their routine and we had to make a
band practice in Terra Bella by 5PM. It was a very very nice time.
Believe it or not, we’re in high gear (8th over…for
all you truckers out there) getting ready for the big (think “huge”) yard sale
during the third weekend in October. I kid thee negative; this may well be the largest
sale so far. That’s pretty amazing given that the one four years ago was
astounding
(http://elranchorelaxodetortuga.blogspot.com/2014/12/rancho-travello.html)! It
paid for our trip to Washington, from there to Abilene and San Antonio, Texas,
and then back home! And, that was while hauling our trailer, Dumbo!
The problem is that it will also be the most labor
intensive which is why we’re trying to get an early start on the matter (we
actually got started not long after the previous one ended). Even then, just
getting the stuff out into the front yard will require some superhuman effort
(not too many super-humans loitering around our place that I can tell). UGH.
While there may be a ton of goods to sell, there may only be a half-ton of
labor to go around.
Usually, we personally have 8 to 10 tables set up.
This time, if we can find them, there may be 20 tables just for our stuff!
Then, you have to unpack, unload, and set all of it up within a few days prior.
Most stuff will already be priced so that will help (which is why we mustn’t
slow down at this point).
A lot of our goods are parked at our hangar in
Porterville (it’s the one that houses two airplanes and neither one of them are
mine. Time for another *SIGH*). Those are the things that have been priced and
we’re adding to that stack as we can get to it.
And, we need boxes….lots and lots of boxes. Connie
the Boxer (the lady wears many hats) is high-jacking them at every turn and in
every corner, nook, and cranny between here and Hollywood! There just aren’t
enough of them! She’s determined to accomplish the mission and is as focused as
a frog at a fly farm.
My lightning-fast mind just had to create a new song
that I was sure that I could share with Jimi Hendrix (if’n he were still alive,
that is), "Boxy Lady” (sound of Hendrix riffing in the background)! Of
course, when my mind slowed to sub-sonic speeds, I realized that this idea
probably wouldn’t fly any higher than an opera singer with 36” plastic angel
wings (toi, toi, toi!).
To make matters more….interesting…., not long ago
(when lots of things around here happen) and on our way back from Visalia, we
stopped at a yard sale to see what we could see. The guy that was runnin’ the
place advised that he had first held the yard sale about a month prior and that
not much had gone down the road. As we picked out stuff that we wanted and
inquired of the price, he said, “Aw, you can have it”. Then he almost
immediately stated, “Just take all of it if you want it”. Guess what? We wanted
it!
We loaded up the back of the van to the gunnels (and
wishing it was a new Ford “King Ranch” F250, six speed, “Power Stroke” diesel
powered, pick up with the 32,000 pound tow package so we could haul off
anything and everything at any time) and thanked him mightily (once he gets to
know us better, we’ll go back and hug his neck)! After querying him about when
we could return with our trailer, he advised that it may take a week or so
since he was busy the next week.
We stopped in about ten days or so later and hauled
off another fat load with the van. In a few more days, the trailer will be used
to haul the larger stuff and finish the deal. Freebies are our friend!
That being said, it doesn’t take a math teacher to
figure out that we have to sort, clean, and price a lot of stuff in the next
few weeks. That may not sound like a chore but we haven’t yet tackled the barn
to see what we can glean for the yard sale (and make room for it to actually be
used for more than storage)! There’s so much stuff in there I may have to rent
a dump truck to help. The best that I can tell, I’m thinking is that it may
take until Christmas of 2020 to clean out the barn. Not yet sure how we’re
going to amp up the action around here so that we can assure that the barn
stuff gets mixed in with the yard sale stuff. Don’t’ touch that dial.
A cool Idea: not long ago, Connie was unhappy over
the attic access hole in the garage. She figured that it was allowing vermin to
come in and raid our rice (or whatever, dude). I agreed and promptly slapped a
24” x 34” slab of “3/8” plywood over it. Four deck screws later, it’s a done
deal. I was her hero (Aw, shucks, ma’am. Twern’t nothin’).
That’s not the end of the story. Not all that long
later, she is still figuring (something she
does a lot of around here). It appeared to her that we needed to cool down the
garage because we have some canned goods stored out there. And, if you keep the
temperature cooler, your stored goods last longer. The Ol’ Rancher certainly
concurred with her assessment but he also knew that there was a project being
brewed up in her head.
Enhancing the garage with a separate cooling system
was not part of the thinking so that was out. It wouldn’t have been all that
expensive to just park a big evaporative cooler in the far window and let her
rip. But, we’re dealing with yard saler’ers here and yard sale’ers are a bit
frugal (maybe even two bits frugal). What to do?
After pondering the matter rather extensively, the
solution seemed to be to simply open up the garage door and draft the existing
air from Ol’ Swampy into the garage. Oh, wait; how are we going to exhaust the
air given that the attic access is battened down? We can’t just open the far
window because it presents a security risk. "What to do (times two)"?
Simple: we just cut a large rectangle in the board of the new attic access
cover and cover the hole with a screen to keep creepy crawly things out!
We’re still not at the end of the story yet (things
around here always tend to get interesting, don’tcha know). Hmmmm; what about
the fact that we don’t have anything between the garage and the house when we
open the door? We could just hear the pitty-patter of witto bitty mousey feet tromping
through our kitchen. Oh…that (sound of
fast and furious pondering). Connie, who runs a mouse-less house, quickly came
to the rescue.
The solution was to install a security screen door
between the house and the garage. How simple is that?! Within a short time
after Connie doing her homework to get the best deal, we headed to “Lowe’s”,
grabbed our screen door, and hauled it home in Wooly Pulley. We also picked up
a simple bathroom door handle (so we couldn’t lock ourselves out of the
house….we’re dealing with old people here) and installed it.
Still figuring, she realized that the metal mesh on
the screen door wouldn’t keep out the tiny flying bugs that seem to always show
up without an invitation. I don’t recall seeing any smoke or hearing any gears
grinding but I do know that she was a mile deep in figuring out how to resolve
this issue.
Now, I want you to realize how sharp this lady is.
When the bulb lit up, she said, “Why can’t we just put a regular window screen
over the exposed area?”. Within no time, she cut a large chunk of screen, spray
painted it white to match the door, and secured it (quite nicely, I might add)
to the frame; the door was ready to install. It was my turn now.
The entire matter was actually rather
straightforward. All that was necessary was to align the door, drill some pilot
holes, screw it to the door jamb, and screw on the door sweep. Simple, eh? Not at Rancho Relaxo, it
isn’t. Mounting the door proved to be a piece of pie (thank you, Elya Baskin as
Maxim Brajlovsky – “2010” in ’84). But, there was a catch.
After mounting the door, it became obvious that there
would be gaps large enough for bugs to crawl through down at the threshold (but
we decided not to use thresh this time). The Ol’ Rancher had to grab a 2” x 2” x 38" board and custom make an auxiliary threshold. With a little help from a miter saw, a chisel, my
table saw, a few deck screws, and some caulking, the garage-side threshold was
secured and the entry was creepy crawly critter proof. The garage is now as
cool as the house and without any additional energy usage! Amazing!
Gardening Report: oh, deer! Recently, the Ol’
Rancher went to water his garden boxes and notices that far too many leaves on
his tomato plants were missing. Half the plants were skeletal. This isn't a good thing. The first thought was that one of our local
deer had found a new place to snack during the evening hours. But, when he saw
a huge, fat, green caterpillar crawling on the plant, he was forced to reassess
the matter.
In only a few minutes, a half dozen of the invaders
were plucked from the plants. They were the notorious “tomato hornworm”
caterpillar. We’re taking steps to eradicate and prevent another infestation.
But, it looks like it may be too late for this season's plants to produce much
after being eaten for breakfast…and lunch….and dinner (third *SIGH*).
Chickenin’ Report: Our peevish Polish peckster,
Cluck Norris, is gone on down the road. There was concern that he just wouldn’t
tolerate strangers or even Connie. So, we boxed him up and found a new home for
him. His new home has lots of free ranging room and he’ll be happen chasing
down whatever hens are in his domain.
The remaining four birds are doing well and three of
the hens are doing their part to keep us supplied with huevos. We’re still
pondering when and how we will re-start the chickenin’ program. Stay tuned for
that.
There you have it: another episode of what's
happening at Rancho Relaxo, home of Rancho Ran, the world's foremost authority
(the previous one died) and Connie the Canner (world's greatest side-cook): where
the air smells like a giant hot loaf of bread (when there aren't any dead
chickens lying around): where things can get...interesting, and where...you
just never know.
.
