Rancho Pero, Pollos, y Huevos

"Say....you wouldn't happen to be through with that gorgeous baloney sandwich, would you?". Our little barkasaurus likes to dash in and suddenly appear in your face. "Dear Abbie........we need to talk".

I love having a huntin' dog! No Gypsies can ever sneak up behind you! I lived to fight another day!

We finally got our patio finished! The contractor, Rob Sanford and crew, did a great job. The lattice work turned out great! Now, if our chickens free range, they won't be roosting on our patio! The furniture came from dear friends, the Piazzas, who moved to the coast of Oregon and sold stuff they didn't want to haul. We got their patio furniture! The table has a glass top and is beautiful! I can just smell the BBQ warming up now! Kindly disregard the date. Yours truly forgot to reset the time when  he changed the batteries on his digi-cam.Reckon it'll be awhile before I'm a professional.

Some of our mature layers. They are true producers! The greens they are parsing are the chopped up produce tailings from a local supermarket. Our chickens undoubtedly have the most well-rounded diet of any fowls to be found. They get "Layena" pellets, chicken scratch, and greens! That's balanced, I'd say! The light green "doo-dah" to the far right is one of two designated chicken watering troughs. We also have 4 "inverted bottle" waterers and a five gallon water bucket with nipples on the bottom that the chickens nudge for a drink. We don't want any powdered eggs!

That's Connie's egg basket hanging from our chicken's "chill pole". The seem to dig flying up there and parking for a spell.

We got eggs!! Later in the day, there'll be another 6 or more to collect. The pullets aren't producing yet so the "regulars" are tossing 1 1/2 dozen eggs per day at us. We're scrambling to get our networking done and our fliers, and other advertising in place for when our pullets go to work. So far, we're keeping up with production and it looks like more will be coming in.

Here's Abbie meeting the Peckenpaw sisters who are members of the "No Luck Dumb Cluck Club". From left are: Pecky Sue, Henrietta, and Peckahontas (rumor has it she had a different father).

Because the hen house is also the repository of no small amount of chicken droppings (a topic for another posting but a rather interesting one, nonetheless), we use designated sandals with which to trod through the crap carpet. It preserves the sanctity of Connie's well cared for floors and carpet. Well, here at the ranch, we don't just wear sandals! No, sireee! We wear Poop Coop Booties. Has a nice ring to it, eh? Sounds like the makin's of a new Country Music ditty!
Lest we go "EEEEEEeeeeeeewwwww!" all at the same time, we keep a deep layer of straw and sawdust on the floor. So, our trampling about is not as bad as it may first appear. We keep the coop pretty clean and haul the old stuff to a compost pile (a really large compost pile) out in back between the bees and the oranges.



OK...so....just where is all the time going (and so quickly)? I know...Ol' Ran is ranting about the rapid elapsing of time ...again. But, think about it; if there were no bleating about how it's already well into the year without any knowledge of what happened, no one would believe that this was an authentic posting, now, would they?! I still hate it that we're staring the front the end of June in the face. 

Anyway, all is well here at the Rancho. I must say that we are truly blessed....and tired. I guess it's OK to be both. To say that Rancho Ran and his side-cook, Canning Connie, are busy is about like saying that Texas is getting some rain. We try to get enough rest but sometimes must (emphasis on the "must") allow a nap to come upon us and overtake us. So far, we managed to be captured only a few times but are giving due diligence to not outrun these persistent pursuers. They surely are welcomed when they do nab us (especially when we least expect it).  What with phone calls, company, people dropping off computers, ministry, and whatever other exigencies of life that are presented, our excursions into refreshment are usually brief. But, c'est la vie. We takes what we can gets and yawn from there.

Imagine; only a few weeks ago, we could spell "Chicken Ranchers" but were only "thinnin' about it" (as in: "I'll do the thinnin' around here, Baba!" - my pal, Quickdraw McGraw. All you old people remember that!). In fact, we were thinnin' about perhaps 4 layers or so and thought that having a few fresh eggs on hand would be good idea. Now, we're collecting more than a dozen eggs....per day! That's marvy! But, our 23 pullets haven't started laying yet!! They should start producing around the end of July or first part of August. It's difficult for us to comprehend having 3 or 4 dozen eggs per day with which to deal/market. It never crossed my mind for a moment that we'd ever be swimming in egg yolks someday!

At this point, we are making inroads for marketing our "Rancho Eggs". We have fliers and business cards prepared and are letting everyone we know that we have fresh eggs available. Given the encroaching egg "crisis" (precipitated by the "chicken flu" in the mid-west), and that we are only selling ours for only slightly above that of the supermarket (3 bucks per doz.), and we should have huevos flying out of the coop. Hmmmm....wonder if we should change our name to "The Flying Huevos Ranch"? It does have a nice ring to it! NAW!  If I can get to it (sure...on my next day off.), I'll even rustle up a "Facebook" page to go along with the new e-mail addy (ranchorelaxoeggs@gmail.com). Methinks our new motto may be "Got Eggs?".

And, if that doesn't just chuck dirt in your yurt, we may be picking up another 15 or so layers soon! An acquaintance has a brother  who is tired of his chickens and is looking for a new home for them. If he throws his chickens at us, we won't duck.

Connie, the Chickenator, does much of the care taking for our new feathery charges and she is doing a great job. I doubt if she ever thought she would be a "chicken grandma" and tending a brood of 42 feathery "grand-chicks". She takes the produce trimmings from a couple of the local supermarkets and chops them all up for them and adds table scraps to the huge pile. The heap'o greens are added to the regular "Layena" and "chicken scratch" already in their feeders. They love her to pieces and come running without even being called! She is the best chicken sitter around. "Ol' Connie the Chicken Sitter"...has sort of a ring to it, eh? I think she's hoping that no one gives us a bull!

Speaking of "Canning Connie", she's already canning stuff! Folks have been throwing veggie and fruit goodies at us and it  goes right into the hot bath! The other day, a friend tossed some fresh strawberries at her so she got right to it and made some jam! Ziggity! That ought to go well with the new bucket of vanilla ice cream we just brought home!  Then, there's the pile of green beans that the supermarket unloaded prior to them getting overripe. We rescued them from their shopping cart display and got them for about half-price and Connie shoved them into her canner. Green beans are our friends! Later in the season, we should be getting more green beans, squash, zucchini, tomatoes and what all from our garden boxes. And, our prune tree is ready for harvest! I can just here the pressure cooker-canner rockin' now!

Princess Abbie report: well...what can I say? Our darling princess (aka "Coonie" or "Goombah" depending upon her behavior) is settled into her realm and becoming a real farm dog. The lay of the land is now mapped in her skull so not much gets by her.  She is not without fault, though (royalty rarely are, eh?). She's a bit of a chewer and a snatch-and-hauler and will conscript whatever innocent item that is within reach to be the next victim of a good gnawing session. It's usually something plastic but not always. We almost nicknamed her "Chewie". 

She's also a climber which is what a friend advised us about and to watch for. She scaled a couple of obstacles the other day so she could investigate what was in Connie's egg basket that had been set in a "safe place" while she tended the chickens in the coop. She pulled the egg basket to the ground which left four eggs conveniently broken and ready to serve. That foray netted her some delicious fresh eggs and a good scolding. I was hoping to not have to refer to my pretty princess as an "egg sucking dog" but I may not have an option. *SIGH*.

She got to romp and stomp for about half of the day today with the new neighbor's big long-haired dog. He is about three times her size but that didn't slow our huntin' doggie down at all. She had him on the run 100% of the time! He had jumped his electric fence while his owners were away and wanted to explore the new territory. The bad part was that they ended up assaulting a mud hole at ninety miles per hour and came out covered with ten pounds of muck. It'll take a long bath and a jug of dog-wash before our princess will be pretty again.

Now...this pooch is a non-stop hunting machine. She is bred to hunt all night long and is almost tireless and is also terribly attentive to every small detail.  She's so high strung that, if she were a guitar, her E string would break! Morning, noon, or night, it's time to play NOW and she lets you know by shoving her fetch toys in your face. When she fetches, it's at a dead run. Only, it's more like she's flying! That's not an exaggeration! She leaps almost like a dear and it appears that she spends as much time in the air as on the ground! She's unreal! I've never seen such an animal that can't and won't quit. It's flat out or nothing which makes her the epitome of the proverbial "full throttle model"

But, that means she's a handful, to say the least. Think about it: she's an energetic puppy, hyper-active, and hyper-vigilant meaning that she's genetically engineered to be ADD. What else need I say? 

When we feed out cluckers, Abbie is right there to make sure she's part of the operation. I'm still not sure whether she wants to invite them home for lunch or use them as fetch toys. Some people have a Australian Sheep Dog, some have a sled dog, some have laps dogs, and some have a watch dog. We thought we had a coon-hound but now I think we have a Tennessee Chicken Dog.  But, we love her to pieces. For better or for worse, she's still 25 pounds of high-speed huntin' muscle.

Wonder of wonders if Ol' Ran didn't fire up his big Webber Genesis Grill after it had set patiently on the patio for almost a year ! There were some pork steaks and some hamburger hiding in the fidg-a-fator (at least that's what my daughter called it when she was 2) that were calling our names. So, the next thing you know, I had one on my plate smothered with par-grilled then pan fried potatoes and topped with 4 sunny-side-up fresh eggs! Connie scarfed down a large "humburger" (I'll let you in on that one later). Life is good! 

 We're lookin' at a high temp tomorrow of about 88 deg. and there's no snow in the forecast (dang! I could have used at least 2" of good cold white stuff). That's a bit out of my comfort zone especially since, only two days ago, it was overcast and around 70 degrees. And, it's expected to get warmer every single day from now on until probably early October. The good news is that our A/C unit and "Ol' Swampy" have been checked and serviced and are set to cool the ranch hands down. We have a huge supply of teas too. Our ice maker is working nominally so we should be braced for the long hot summer. It could get ugly. I think we may even see more of "Captain Underpants" hanging around the place. 

Well, farm fans, it's time to batten down the press for the night. The chickens are roosting, the farmhands are fed, Abbie is on guard, and all is fairly tidy. Lots to do tomorrow and plenty yet tonight. Stay tuned for further episodes and escapades of  "Rancho Relaxo". Things could get....interesting.